Today I just need somewhere to gush about Dallin. I look at our journey and I'm amazed at how far we've come. We survived the jungle of high school dating. We've been through a heart surgery, a break up and now his mission.People say love is stronger than fear. But lately I've learned that love is stronger than more than that. Love is stronger than reason. Love is stronger than doubt. Love is stronger than loneliness. Having a long distance relationship in which we can only communicate through e-mail once a week makes no logical sense. There is no reason why I shouldn't be able to just move on. But love pulls me back. No matter how lonely I get, no matter how stressful and confusing it is I can't get away from Dallin because I know that being without him would be worse than anything I've ever experienced. I love him with all of my heart. I don't think I can ever feel about this way about some one else again. Some times I day dream about Dallin. In my dreams we are in a car driving far away. Just the two of us. We leave everything behind us. We just drive and drive and laugh. The sun is shining and he's looking at me with those sincere eyes. Lots of my memories about him have faded. I can't remember what his laugh sounds like or what he smells like. But I remember those eyes. Always watching. Waiting to see what I'll do next. I love that man!

Happy Anniversary!

Today is our three year anniversary. It is bitter sweet. Every year for the past three years Dallin and I have gone to that big gold "D" at Davis and shared one or two sweet kisses. We sit and remember the first trip we made there and think about how far we've come. I walked by that place with my mom today. What's strange is that it is so much the same. I can almost see me walking in my pink homecoming dress holding hands with Dallin all giddy and excited. And yet so much has changed. I don't think we are even those same people anymore. We grew up quickly because of the things we've been together. I think we share a deeper love than a lot of people find in a life time! Tonight I wonder if He is dreaming about me. Or if he's thinking about that night. I can't wait until we're together again. :)

Dallin has been gone for nine months now. The first six months I felt every second of his absence. Gradually new emotions surfaced with the heartache. I go through phases of joy, peace, fear, loneliness. Today the theme is loneliness. I can't help but wish that he was here to hold me. I feel like he can look right inside me and see the things that no one else will. I wish he was here to just rub my back and bring me the peace I find in his love. People say that you can't know what love is when you are sixteen. But Dallin and I have learned together. Through laughter and tears. Sorrow and joy. He is the piece of me that has been missing and I can't wait for him to come home and put me together. 

The Beginning

This blog is for me to tell the true story of my best friend Dallin Granger Williams and the adventure of our love. Dallin and I met on September 13, 2008. We attended a Davis High football game with a mutual friend. Contrary to my childhood assumptions we didn't have sparks or butterflies immediately. But he quickly became my good friend. He saw something in me that no one else did including myself. I don't think anything could prepare me for the intensity of the emotions that we experienced together in the years that followed. I often wonder who I would be if I hadn't met him when I did. Over the past three years we have laughed and cried together. Dallin held my hand through heart surgery and later patiently waited for me to redefine myself as a person. He was my first kiss and my first love. He has been my devoted friend, doctor, clown, teacher, missionary and sweetheart. Now it's my turn to support him. He has been called to serve the Lord in Cordoba, Argentina. This blog a place for me to dump the joys, sorrows, fears and successes that come with waiting for this valiant young man.